Looking for Perfection

For most of my life, I have had an insatiable need to be perfect. At some point I realized that I thought this perfection would bring me love. Needless to say (but I’m going to say it anyways) I am not perfect. But I still have this belief that in order to be loved I need to be perfect. This has affected every relationship I have ever had, from family to friends to coworkers to waitresses to doctors… You get the picture.

Recently I realized that the 40+ years of my spiritual journey has been an attempt to become perfect. This has shaken me to my core. Have I really corrupted my spiritual journey with my agenda for perfection? Has all of my searching for that “thing” really been about being perfect? I felt disgusted with myself. And very, very sad.

I took this heart-wrenching dilemma to my spirit guide and asked what to do about it. I saw my spirit guide upside down. After trying to make sense of this for a couple of minutes, I finally joined him, standing on my head.

He said “You are looking at this upside down. Your need for perfection has led you to find the perfection of Spirit and the Love that it holds. Have you not found perfection? Have you not found Love? You will never find these in the outer world, but you have found them inside you.”